The Red Basin: August 2008

Friday, August 8, 2008

TRB3: Chapter 1: A Fully Orchestrated Soundtrack and Jaw-Dropping Special Effects.

Well well well. Back at it, huh? You guys just don't rest! It's been 6 years since the last post, but the viruses you all downloaded from the second chapter of this story that let me monitor your computers shows that you've been checking 5 times a day. Well, I won't disappoint. This is the real deal. This is the Red Basin that you've all been waiting for; The Red Basin 3: The Elkin Chamber is bigger, better, and so full of awesome that you'll have to stop and catch your breath after every single word. That's the intensity that it's packing. That's the precision that each word is picked with. Perfectly crafted.
Anyways, where did we leave off? Noah and Emily have just met up with Donnie and some little guy named Guurnt, who had apparently bought The G Bomb from some street vendor, I guess. Also, Noah wants to love shrimp skewers. So, what's going to happen?! I can tell you this much, it's so close to the time that you actually get to see The Red Basin itself, it's insane. Will it be this chapter? Will it be RIGHT NOW!? Maybe... maybe... Anyways, Noah is a little concerned, but The G Bomb is totally all for his new owner. So, let's see what happens! You've been waiting for so long, The G Bomb is your favorite character, and his fate is pretty the only thing that keeps you interested in this story! Wait! I have a better idea! What about Princess? What about the inhabitants of The Four Legged City? What about NEITHER!? This chapter starts with a brand spanking (sort of) chatacter. Hope you love it, because here goes. The Red Basin 3: The Elkin Chamber: Chapter 1: A Fully Orchestrated Soundtrack and Jaw-Dropping Special Effects. (Recap, remember the wolves that were going to help princess? This is about one of them. Now you won't feel lost.)

The air was thick with dust as the steady south wind churned it up across the vast expanse of cracked earth. The two wolves ran tirelessly across the desert, leaving the city limits shrinking in the hazy distance. They moved effortlessly across the barren ground, interrupted from their straight course by the occasional gorge, stand of withered trees or abandoned building. The larger of the two lead, his dark fur becoming caked by the consistent headwind of blasting of dust, giving his normally pristine onyx coat a shabby beaten appearance. The other was less diminished by the dirt, his fur being the same colour as it, making him nearly invisible in the inhospitable terrain, the pack strapped around his back the only thing distinguishing him from the dirt around them. They ran on for many hours, until the city was nothing but a glowing orange haze on the horizon and the sun had long set. "We stop at the next canyon." Void, the lead wolf growled, his eyes stinging and nearly closed from the constant dust.
"Agreed, Chieftain. our contact should be there, and it should be sheltered. Possible even a river runs through." Fervor said back. "We should be well received." The two ran on for a short while longer, until very suddenly in the dust and dark, a deep narrow canyon opened up before them. They spent a moment locating a suitable path down, and then gingerly hopped down like goats on a mountain slope to the canyon floor. Taking a moment to shake the dust from their coats, they moved toward the middle, where there was no river, but a small river-fed pool about 30 feet across lined by small shrubs.
"Your contact will be about?" Void asked, sniffing the air. "I need water. The run was longer than I thought." They moved off toward the pool.
"He will be about." The two of them got to the pool and began to drink. The cloudy night did little to help them see the small creature approach, but they smelt it before it was too close. "Ah, there he is." Fervor mumbled, retreating a few steps from the pool. Void looked up as the small shape materialized from behind a bush. It was dog-like, but much smaller, with a dingy orange coat, and immense ears.
"Your contact is a rat?" Void growled threateningly to Fervor.
"Actually, a fox, thanks." The newcomer hissed. "That's no way to greet a friend!"
"Friends earn a their greeting, Rat." Void rumbled. "You're merely trying to buy it." The little creature didn't seem to notice the insult, and grinned hugely.
"Well, it's an honor to finally get to meet you in the flesh, Void, Chief of the Tribe of the Wolf, and supplier of great comforts for a little fox." The fox ambled closer and sat on his haunches in front of the intimidating pair, not even shaken in the slightest. "So? What's your offer?" Void growled at the little beast. He hated dealing with low lives like this fox, but knew his own networks weren't nearly large enough to get all the information he needed. The Foxes Guild was one of the most established groups of informants in the area, and he needed their information desperately right now.
"Give it to him." The black wolf sneered, moving away from the little beast. Fervor flipped the pack off of his shoulder and pawed it open, then rummaged around for a moment. The foxes eyes glittered in anticipation. How he loved this part of his job! His grin widened, and his sharp pink tongue flopped out the side. Fervor reached in with his mouth and pulled out what looked like a metal net. He shook it out and held it up. It was a finely crafted chain shirt with The Four Legged City crest boldly emblazoned on the breast. The foxes mouth dropped open, and he ran up and snatched it up to inspect it. It was a rare gift, to get something that valuable for mere information. This is how badly they needed what knowledge this fox possessed.
"It's amazing!" The orange creature cooed. "I don't even want to know who you had to kill to get this!" He giggled. "Well, that's more than enough for me! What can I do for you?"
"You know what we want to know!" Fervor snapped, appalled by sight of a vermin like the fox holding such a treasure.
"You'll have to be more specific." teased the fox, knowing perfectly well what information they were after. The wolves glowered at him. "Ok, ok! I'll tell you." He folded up the shirt and whipped it onto his back like a saddle. "But you have to tell me first, why are you looking for it?"
"Where is it?" roared Void, having fully lost his temper with this annoying rat. "Where is The Red Basin?" The fox recoiled, having realized that tonight wasn't a good night for word games, and these wolves would be unlikely to enjoy them even on a good night.
"You know the mountains far far North of here? The Atlas Range?" Void narrowed his eyes at the fox. "Well, there is a chamber there. An Elkin Chamber, to be more precise." He was deciding not to skip on the specifics tonight, considering his company. "It's one of the few that are still operational. You can see it from the top of Mount Atlas, if you look into the Eastern valley. It's about 4 miles from the summit. That's where it is. That's where you'll find The Basin." He took a deep breath, looking at his employers. Void seemed distracted, thinking about something. Fervor was staring at the fox, trying to discern any untruths that may have escaped his pointed face.
"Alright, let's head out. We have to go back through the city to tell the Queen. " Void said flatly. "We have a long road ahead of us." Fervor nodded, and the two of them turned away and toward the slop leading out of the ravine.
"Thanks a bunch!" The fox shouted after them. Fervor turned, a concerned look on his face.
"Where did you learn it's location, little pest?" he demanded. The fox looked taken aback, but then a huge grin spread across his pointed features.

"A little bird told me." he laughed, as they plodded out of the ravine.

Ha! I'm thinking that that's going to be awesome. I have a plan. For the last 28 years, I've been writing rough drafts of this chapter, and I think I've finally gotten it right! You're the judge, though! There you have it: The Red Basin is in an Elkin Chamber somewhere in the north mountains. That could mean pretty much anything, me having very poorly described any geography so far in the story. That's ok though, because you have the most powerful tool of all on your side! YOUR IMAGINATION! Hooray! Yea, anyways, I'm going to make another entry soon, and it's going to rule. You'll see.

The Third Chapter: Chapter 3

Ah, 1:00am on a Tuesday! Or, as it's more commonly known as: Story Time! That's right, it's time for another installment! Awesome. You're all so excited! I'm so excited! This one might be the best one yet. It's a Noah heavy entry, so you're all happy. Might be some twists, might now. Might be LOTS though. Also might now have any. That's how I roll. If you haven't figured it out, go back and re-read the last 7 entries. Anyways, what happened last time?

Noah and Emily and The G Bomb had just ended up at Donnies Discount Tablery. Now, I realize that previously in the story, I had called it Donny's Discount Tablery, but I've changed that. I like the new way better. Ok, back to whatever. They had just got there, and the dogs were getting ready to do something about a basin or something, I don't remember. Anyways, here goes! The third, and FINAL installment of: The Red Basin II: The Third Chapter: Chapter 3: Hello My Name Is... Guurnt..?

The doors slid open smoothly and quickly away from the trio as they approached, making barely a sound. As they moved into the breezeway, a long, dimly lit hallway, they snapped shut behind. They walked down the hall toward a second set of automatic doors. As they approached, the faint sound of gentle music could be heard coming from the other side, and through the tinted glass, hints of bright coloured lights filtered through. "Remember" reminded Emily "Donnie is a business man, so make sure you're on your best behavior. We want this to go smoothly." They stopped before the pressure mat that would open the last portal. "I know you've never been here, so stay close. It's not exactly what you're expecting."
"How does she know what I'm expecting?" Noah asked no one, as she moved toward the doors. As they stepped onto the mat, the high doors swooshed open, and the sight was in fast, nothing at all what Noah had expected. The place was massive! Resembling what was more like a massive bazaar than a table shop, dozens of kiosks and other small shops sprawled out in front of them, some multiple storeys, all with blazing neon signs advertising their wears. Mountains of merchandise stretched toward the distant ceiling. If the outside world was abandoned, this was surely the reason why. masses of people moved about, trading, selling, laughing, yelling. A pair of men were looking to start a fight off near a shop that apparentaly sold lavish carpets, the shop keep trying in vain to calm them. "Jeez.' Breathed Noah. "This is exactly what I had expected." Emily gave him a berating look and started off down one of the "alleyways". As they continued on, passing under a bridge between two of the larger shops, they passed what looked like a restaurant, crowded with people and selling what looked like grilled shrimp, right off of a giant grill in the middle. "Mmm, that smells great!" Noah sighed, straining to get a closer look past the throng of people. "Can we get some fish things, or something? I'm famished." Emily turned on him, and scolded "Noah, we're already late for this meeting with Donnie, and you want to get some shrimp snacks?" The G Bomb continued down the alley without them. "Do you even like shrimp?"
"I like the idea of shrimp." Noah reasoned. "And besides, we're already late, what's a few more minutes?" Emily growled and grabbed his wrist, pulling him back in the right direction. Noah resisted, reaching out with his free arm toward the shrimp grill, and finally gave up falling back into step behind Emily, grumbling. "I love shrimp, I bet." They walked a ways further, past more interesting shops, none of which sold shrimp, and finally came to an opening, something that looked like a small square or park, with white benches ringing it's full circumference. More heaps of merchandise bordered the square, giving it artificial walls. In the middle, stood a man dressed in a pristine white suit, chatting loudly with a small group of what appeared to be merchants. He had slick black and a short curling mustache. He carried a white walking stick capped with a golden goose head, and wore shiny black shoes. When the pair (Neither noticed The G Bombs disappearance as of yet) came into his view, the mans ever opened wide and a great big grin came over his face, he quickly ended his conversation with the merchants, and arms out wide approached Emily and Noah.
"Friends!" He greeted, his teeth were gold. "You 'ave made it!" He crushed them in an embrace. Noah, taken by surprise, started to protest, but was quickly silenced, due to lack of air. The man broke off the hug, and backed up a step, his smile never fading. "I thought that you might not show!" Big ol' smile still.
"Ha, well, sorry about that, we got caught up in traffic." Emily lied. "But, we are here, and we're ready to work!" She pointed over to Noah. "This is Noah, he's a friend, and a terrific worker! He's going to be my partner on this job, if that's ok with you. Noah, this is Donnie, of Donnies Discount Tablery. He's a great man." Donnie looked at Emily, his grin growing.
"You flatter me, Emeel." He cooed, feigning embarrassment. "No-ha, pleasure to meet you." He reached a hand out to Noah, who hesitantly took it in his, and received a vigorous shake. The gold rings on Donnies hands dug into his knuckles, the handshake was that firm! Upon release, Donnie sniffed the air, and asked "Is that Kenyan Dark that I smell? Wonderful!" Noah shot Emily a smirk. "Ah, what a day, but we have work to do!" He turned and started off to the door at the opposite end of the square. "Does he know that your name is actually Emily, and not Emeel?" Noah asked.
"I have no idea why he doesn't get anyone's names right." Emily said "But he always has some weird version."
"Weird." Noah added. "He was pretty close with mine though, you have to admit! Maybe he knows that I have huge potential." Emily shot another berating look at him, and picked up her pace. Noah, smirk in tow began after her. Before they got to the door though, it opened, and a short man with an amazingly large, but flat, head walked out. He was nearly a sphere, and his flat head helped accentuate this fact. He wore an army green vest, and a red truckers hat, that was overly round, apparentaly to disguise the flatness of his head. "Oh! My friend! You two, you must meet my wonderful friend!" Donnie bent low and hugged the little man, who appeared to hate it as much as Noah, if not more. "This is.. Um.. This is, my friend!" Donnie clearly had forgotten the mans name. "Introduce yourself, my friend! This is Noo-ka and Emeel! They have come to give us a hand today!" The man cleared his throat, and, his head and wide mouth very animated, said.
"Hello."
"What up?" Noah greeted casually.
"Hi, I'm Emily." Emily added.
"Nice to meetcha." The little man vigorously replied.
"Um, what's your name?" Emily awkwardly asked, after a few moments silence.
"Oh, right. Uh, my name is." He paused, seeming surprised. "Uh.. I'm... My name is.. G-g..El... Ern..er.. guurnt..?" he stumbled, apearing to have made the entire thing up, very unconvincingly. Emily scrunched up her face shooting him a confused look.
"Nice to meet you Guurnt." Noah said, appearing to have not noticed the bumbling whatsoever. Emily turned her scrunched up face to Noah.
"Um, right, nice to meetcha." The little man bobbed, looking nervous. "Hey, look what I bought!" He seemed desperate to change the conversation. "Was only twenty bucks from some drunk down near the pond!" He reached and began to open the door he had come through the rest of the way.
"There's a pond?" Noah asked no one. The door swung open, and standing there, smug as a bug, was a little robot, no higher than your weist, with a pot of fresh coffee sitting in its open chest cabinet. If The G Bomb was capable of smiling, he would have put even Donnie to shame right then.

I love that entry. What a cool building! I bet not what you expected at all, never mind Noah! And what's all this about The G Bomb getting bought? Has he finally escaped Noah? Will he finally be able to exact the revenge on him he so sorely craves? We'll have to wait and find out! I give myself... 4.5 out of 5 stars for that one. Shrimp grills.

The Third Chapter: Chapter 2

Looks like you're hooked. I love it! Pretty soon, I'll be getting hundreds of emails asking me to host advertisements on my story, and they'll pay trillions! All thanks to you, thanks to me. We're quite a team, me and you, although I do all the hard stuff, and you just get to look at the hard stuff. That reminds me of a story! This one time, I made this wonderful short story, about a thing, and everyone from far and wide came to read it. It was terrific. Anyways, on with the show(rt story)! Wait! Should I continue on with the amazing Princess storyline, or keep you all amused with the comic japes of Noah and his silly The G Bomb? Tell you what, this is how it's going to work: It'll be a cool time fun old CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE! That's right, it's here! The very first, new and improved, once-in-a-lifetime Choose Your Own Adventure! Here' goes!

The Red Basin 2: The Third Chapter: Chapter 2: The Tough Choices We Make!

To begin...

It's been a while since we last saw Noah and Emily in their rusty car, on their way to Donnies Discount Tablery. Now, this Tablery is probably one of the finest in their whole part of the city, having tables of both the 1 and 4 legged variety. They also range in colour from White-with-a-hint-of-blue to Black-with-a-hint-of-red. You might not know it, but that's a very wide range of colours. Not shades. As soon as it's "black with a hint of whatever", or "white with a something of something", it's not white or black anymore, so don't give me this stupid shade argument. It won't fly, because we both know you're wrong. Anyways, Lots of colours and tables. Awesome. Now, our Hero (Noah is the hero, I guess) had just been involved in an unpleasant encounter with The G Bomb, from which he had taken a clout to the jaw. That aside, all was going well. That aside, it wasn't. Emily is sad, Princess has apparently exploded mustard or something, and the street is dusty. Sounds like a riot. Ok though, we're getting to the adventure part! Proceed!

Page 42:
The gross little car pulled into an empty parking space outside of what was apparently Donnies Discount Tablery. "This is it, apparently." Emily said, looking at the building. It was a large building, maybe 4 or 5 stories tall, and taking up about a fifth of a city block length wise. The sign, which was their biggest hint, was a massive neon marquee, green like lime sno-cones and flashing slowly and randomly. It read: "Donn es D sco nt Tabl ry" and was itself nearly 4 stories in height. It bathed the street in front of it with a strange glow, sort of like a hospital after 8:00pm. It was unsettling, but you always felt like you were being looked after at Donnies. That's one of their selling points, after all! "We're always lookin' after you!" Donnie himself said that on a public television add 2 years back, when they had just finished the sign. It was a huge success. However comforting the sign was though, the street remained vacant, the old rusty car Noah and Emily were in was the only parked car for a few blocks, and pedestrian traffic was fairly low here. "Well, let's get to work!" Emily announced, full of what we can only assume is confidence.
"Alright." Grumbled Noah, unfastening his seat belt. "But to be honest, I have no idea what kind of job this is, you sort of just told me that I had a new job, and to meet you in that weird empty room earlier today."
"What do you mean you don't know what the job is? I left you a message going over the whole thing on your answering machine!" Noah sighed and looked back over his shoulder at The G Bomb, humming happily to himself as he burnt little holes in the back of the seat with his rocket feet.
"Sometimes my machine... doesn't save messages properly." As if on cue, The G Bomb whirred into action, opening up his chest cabinet to reveal a small speaker, out of which came "Hey Noah, it's me, Emily. Uh, just calling to let you know that you have a new job!" in a raspy mechanical tone. "Now, that's just not fair, The G Bomb!" Noah snapped at the robot. He wasn't terribly upset, though, because he often used the excuse "my machine doesn't save messages properly" in the past to avoid other jobs and appointments. This time, he was busted though, as Emily sighed.
"Ok, fine, I know, you hate to work, but we need to. That's kind of how things work, dope. Now, do you want to hear the message, or do you want to just skip it and head inside?"

STOP!!!

If you want Noah to play the message, go to Page 81.

If you want Noah to skip the message, go to Page 117.

Ok, go again.

Page 81.
"You know, I probably should hear it, just in case it's something important." Noah resigned, letting Emily be right. Good call Noah, she's meaner than I remember.
"Ok, The G Bomb, can you play back the rest of the message for Noah?" Emily asked in her nicest, most patient voice.
"Negative, the file has been erased." The G Bomb replied in his metal voice. There was the sound of an old cassette tape being rewound with the "play" button still down, followed by a tinny female's voice "You have... zero... new messages." Emily sighed, and looked helplessly at Noah, who just shrugged. "For more options, please die." The G Bomb quipped, thinking himself very funny for his latest attack on Noah.
"I'm starting to see why you like keeping an exploded dog as a pet, Em." Noah sighed.

Proceed to Page 117.

Page 117.
The car doors slammed shut nearly in unison. Noah shook the last bit of broken glass off of his cloths, as Emily joined him. They began to head inside, but were stopped by a tapping sound behind them. Curious, they both turned to see The G Bomb sitting, eye-plate pressed up against the glass of the back passengers window. "Should we bring him with us?" Asked Emily.
"Nah, he'll only be trouble." Noah reasoned, starting to turn around. Again, a gentle tapping. They turned back to see The G Bomb staring back at them, a small tear running down the sied of what I guess was his face.
"Aw." Emily cooed "we can't leave him in there, it's hot, and he's sad!" She moved toward the car.
"Now I know that that's not a real tear, and that it's just a faulty hydrolic inside him that he's figured out how to use to his advantage, but it still gets me every time." Noah smiled, looking at the cute little robot. "I'll go let him out." He headed back to the car, and opened up the passenger door, allowing The G Bomb to topple head first onto the sidewalk. "Ha! Not as quick as you think you are!" Noah cried in victory, stepping back. There was a short moment of silence, before The G Bomb began to emit what sounded like a tiny metallic sob, followed by more of the same (like crying I guess). Noah's face dropped, and he hurried back over to scoop up The G Bomb. Lifting the robot was no easy task, but Noah had done it enough times to know that the proper way to lift a heavy object off of the ground is with lots of fast, jerking motions, using mainly the muscles in the back. Twisting grossly, Noah managed to get the robot back onto his tracks. The G Bomb then hummed back to life, no sign of ever being upset in any way at all, and rolled over to join Emily at the door to Donnies. "Why do I keep that thing?" Noah grumbled to himself as he loudly popped his joints back into place and corrected his posture. He stretched to make sure all the kinks were out, and then followed his friend and his robot under the green glow, and through the doors of Donnies Discount Tablery.

Meeeeeeeeeeanwhile!

Princess paced the anteroom to The Great Hall of Wonderment, nervous as a queen can be. She had received news from Darian, her trusted friend, and general to her armies, that she was less than eager to share with her people. A few more paces around the room, a few more looks in the ornate mirror to make sure her collar and crown were straight. The door opened, and the old corgi, General Stein trotted in, his face grim. "Your people await you, milady." The old dog growled, his head dipping into a low bow (I still haven't figured out how these dogs are bowing, I just keep typing it assuming you can make something up that works for you." and stepping back out the door. Princess took a deep breath, sucked in her brisket, and walked through the doors. The sound that hit her was deafening, hundreds of thousands of dogs had gathered to hear the dire news their queen had to tell. Dogs of every breed and size stood nervously barking at each other, passing off rumors and speculation as to what this news could be. It had been kept very secret, and everyone was on edge. As soon as she was noticed waling toward the podium, her place of honor between Darian, The General, and a host of other important members of The Royal Council, the din began to soften, until you could hear a... a... well, whatever. Pin? Yea. Pin drop. The silence maintained, until Princess had reached her place. Clearing her throat, she began, "My people!" her voice echoed through the giant hall. "There is news I must spread to you. News that may shock you. It may terrify you. If you are one of the older members of our city, you will know well what I speak of. For my younger subjects, this may seem like nothing at all, but know this!" She let the last word hang, uncertain if she should continue. Thousands of pairs of eyes looked at her. Half that number of tails stood motionless, not daring to wag. She sighed. "I come before you this day, to warn our people, that The Red Basin has been found." A shudder went through the chamber. Speechless, the only noise was the collective gasp of her audience. "But fear not!" She began again, only to be cut off.
"This is the end! It has come!" A dog somewhere shouted. Immediately hundreds joined in, yelling their fears and prayers to everyone and no one all at once. The noise was deafening. Like being at like, a pet store or something, or the Humane Society kennels, and having all those animals barking and howling, only imagine way way more, all at once. Intense.
"BUT FEAR NOT!" Came a new voice, cutting through the cacophony. There was again silence, everyone startled by the harsh edge to the new voice. From the anteroom, stalked a lean black wolf, hit coat shiny and his muscles sleek and sinewy. He wore no collar, and he had a look in his eye that inspired fear. "Your queen has spoken, do you not trust that she has this matter in her control?" The wolf teased the chamber, his every word being absorbed by the curious audience. Princess lowered her eyes, ashamed of what she must do.
"He speaks truth." She announced, her voice filled with more confidence than she felt. "We, the inhabitants of The Four Legged City, under the guidance of our Royal Council, and the infinite wisdom of the Founding 6, have found a way to beat this threat."
"By siding with him?" asked an anonymous voice. The room began to stir again.
"NO!" Shouted Princess, the force of her voice stopping the beginning of another uproar. "He, has come to us for aid." There was silence. "The Tribe of The Wolf has long been our enemy, but I, your queen, have heard the reports, and I have spoken with the witnesses, and it is no farce. The Red Basin hath returned." more silence. "We as a people must unite against this. We, all of Caninekind must join together and fight this evil! We must unite for the sake of everyone! For every sire, bitch and pup! For every litter! For every pack! We must unite!" The room began to hum with what was no longer fear, but approval. "We must fight, for every Four Legged creature! We must unite!" The room erupted in in cheers, as the dogs seemed to gain confidence from their matriarch's inspiring words. Princess let a smile find her face, as she looked out at her subjects. It remained for only a moment, for just then, a low, sinister voice asked,

"So what's your plan, your Highness?"

Whew! That was a big one. Very inspiring! And I must say, turning out fairly well, for an on-the-fly short story! We have some interesting developments! You have some interesting life, spending it sitting here reading this story. Pretty shocking that The Red Basin is actually going to be a part of the story, huh? I honestly don't know how I fit that in there. It was sort of just a name I picked randomly, and assigned a story to. I have all kinds of cool stuff like that. Like a board game called "Upside Door", a song I wrote called "The Wondering Wondering", and my all time favorite, another short story called "Minty Toothpickaxes" Now, go do your homework.

The Third Chapter: Chapter 1

I'm more than a little bit rusty, but I think that I know what I'm doing with this story. Did you check out that snappy new picture that I made? What a basin! Probably the reddest one you've ever seen! Anyways, don't get too excited. There's more wonders to behold up ahead. I give you, after a long long wait, the most anticipated online-blog-story-revival-third-chapter of all time!

The Red Basin II: The Third Chapter: Chapter 1: The Road to DDT.

The small rusty car ambled along the quiet city road, between the run-down old buildings and shops, none of which were up-to-date on the latest heath codes. A gently clinking sound followed the car, as tiny bits of safety glass fell off and bounced to keep up with the old vehicle, before coming to a quiet stop on the street. Or I guess sometimes on the sidewalk. That's another health code violation, I'm sure. Bikes could break their tired on that glass!
"Bikes could break their tires on all this glass!" Noah pointed out as they scooted along, his matted hair trying so hard to wave in the breeze coming in through the broken passenger seat window. Emily, the driver, was all puffy looking and red, on account that her dog had apparently just been exploded or something moments ago in the same seat Noah was now slumping in. Remember that part? She didn't really explode, it was a big weird fat guy that smashed his face through the window. Hilarious! Anyways, as they drove along, Noah kept pulling pieces of glass out of his backside and tossing them out the window-hole. "Do you think that I'm going to get sick or something if I get dog blood in me?" Noah asked his sulky friend. "I mean, I'm sure it would be no big deal, like a cold or something, but that might be enough for me to skip some work, right?" Emily turned a puffy eye to Noah, then shook her head and turned back to her driving. "Jeez, you'd think it was the first time you've had a pet explode or something, the way you're pouting." Emily turned back to Noah, this time there was a hint of anger in her puffs. "Hey, don't give me that look! I mean, I've had The G Bomb for like 5 years now, and he's exploded seriously like a hundred times, or more!" At the mention of his name, the little robot in the back lit up his eye-plate and began to kick the back of Noah's seat, slowly at first, but speeding up steadily. "It's no big deal, all you have to do is save some of this goop and take it to The Doctor (Ooo! New character mentioned there, make sure you put that in your "The Red Basin II: Companion Notebook!") and he'll just mix up a new Princess! Maybe even a better one! Maybe, but don't hold me to this, a Princess that can make coffee, or play music or somethi-."
"I don't want a new Princess!" Emily snapped, her puffs faded, and her normal face returned, only angrier than normal. So I guess her angry-normal face. "And besides, you dope, The G Bomb is a robot. I'm not going to get into the differences with robots and living creatures with you right now, because I don't have all day to explain it to your thick head." She looked pretty mad now. She's not as nice as I remember, to be honest.
"Oh well, you'll see, a new Princess will be better, weather you like it or not, it's going to be cool! Also, since we're on the topic of this goop I'm sitting on, do dogs have spicy mustard in them? Like, that's normal, right?"
"What? No, that's a stupid ques-." Emily turned and looked at Noah with a disgusted look. "Did you taste that stuff?"
"Uh, no, a piece flew into my mouth. Wind resistance or something. Maybe gravity. No, it just looks like mustard! Stop looking at me like that!"
"That's the most disgusting thing I think I've ever heard." Emily shuddered, and turned once again, back to the driving. She's not the best driver, she keeps looking over at Noah or goo or something. Eyes on the road, lady!
"So if dogs don't contain tasty spicy mustard, where did that come f-f-r-r-o-o-m-m? D-d-i-i-d-d y-y-o-o-u-u-." The G Bomb had reached an intense level of banging, and was beating the back of Noah's seat with a vengeance. "C-c-u-u-t-t i-i-t-t- o-o-u-u-t-t!" Noah slammed the seat into the recline position, squishing The G Bomb into a prone position. "You little jerk!" Noah growled, as he turned around to scold the machine. When he looked, the robot began rattling, and a sound like grinding gears erupted from the little robot, followed by a hiss as gasses escaped. The G Bomb shuddered and his lights all went out, his movement slowed and stopped, and a small puff of smoke wafted up from his chest cabinet. "Oh no!" Noah, with a look of genuine concern, leaned back, unfastening his seat belt as he poked his face toward the quiet machine. As soon as he was turned all the way around though, The G Bomb's chest cabinet swung open, catching Noah in the jaw, and sending him reeling back to the front seat. "You little... toaster." Noah grumbled, rubbing his bumped jaw and re-fastening his seat belt.
"You are less than dirt." The G Bomb rasped in his clanky voice. Emily laughed openly, a smile finally returning to her face.
"You know that he wants to kill you, right?" She asked between chuckles.
"Yea, he always has, the stupid tin can." Noah said flicking a piece of glass out of the window. "Hey, where is this place we're supposed to go, anyways? Aren't we close?"
"How could you think we're close if you don't know where it is?" Emily asked.
"I was judging."
"Judging what, the sun?"
"Does that work?" Emily looked at Noah, and, with her best "I'm-not-lying-to-you" face, she replied.
"Of course it does, how do you think sailors know how to get across the ocean?"
"Har har, very funny." Noah retorted, looking smug. "Sailors don't use the sun, you liar, they use dolphins, everyone knows that."
"You didn't see the dolphins a couple blocks back? They were point this way."
"Wait, what?" Noah turned around and looked through the trail of dust following them back the way they had came. "I think I must have missed them."
"Yea, you must have." Emily smiled at her dopey friend. The G Bomb began kicking the back of his seat, slowly.

Part 5

It would seem that I’m completely unable to write anything about The Red Basin at home, and must do it all at work. I guess I’m not nearly as bored when I’m at home as I am when I’m at work. Oh well, I’ve been on days off for the last two days, but I’m back at work, with nothing to do, you lucky reader. You get another installment of The Red Basin! Now here’s the challenge that I’m facing right now though. Should I continue on with the side-story concerning Princess? Or should I return to Noah and Emily on their way to get some tables at Donnie’s Discount Tablery? Oh the choices! Oh the Choices! OOOHHH THE CHOICESSS! I chose. I’m going to continue with Princess. She’s way more interesting, and has the cool crown and servants going on. So there you have it, an uninteresting introduction to the third story installment of The Red Basin. Lay off, I can’t be entertaining all friggin’ day long.

Chapter 2 (not Chapter 1C, which would be lame)

There was a rush of air and a loud grinding as the stone slabs crunched shut behind Princess, Darian and the Corgi Bros.. The four dogs made their way down the tunnel, their dog-vision making the nearly lightless passage seem bright and welcoming. They traveled in silence for a short while, walking quickly down the twisting tunnel as they made their way down into the depths of the Cold Storage building. After some time, the dogs noticed the tunnel growing brighter, as the approached some brilliant light source farther down the tunnel. After more walking, and around jut one more corner, the troupe passed out of the tunnel into the brilliant lit halls of The Four-Legged City.
The Four-Legged City was founded years ago by the dog Muzzle, and his five companions. These brave canines were revered by the nearly all of the one hundred thousand inhabitants of The Four-Legged City. Muzzles five companions included Rex the Redeemer, Cody the Everloving, Sergeant Ralph, Shiva Swiftrunner and Max the Deceiver. Tales of mystery surround Max The Deceiver, and he was generally considered responsible for The Great Dog Exile that took place hundreds of years ago, when he bit his human friend and then covered his tail with a veil of lies and secrecy. Nevertheless though, he was a founding member of The Four Legged City.
The city, buried deep beneath the human city, was amazingly designed, and consisted of six levels connected by sets of spiral ramps or staircases. All of these levels were open in the middle, giving the dogs on them a view of a marvelously sculpted fountain, depicting the Founding Six in the middle of the bottom level courtyard. The city had everything anyone could want. Market places, shops, recreation, parks, houses business sectors, the works! All these things could be found sprawling over their borders and meshing into the other levels of the grand city. The uppermost level was a courtyard filled with statues of previous rulers of the city and fountains of marble and gold surrounding a large opal coloured palace. Corgi’s armed in the finest canine steel patrolled this level, for it was only accessible to those of royal, counsel or military business. Princess looked up at the fountain in the bottom level courtyard.
“Too long have I been away, my brothers.” Princess sighed, watching some pups playing near the fountain, their mother keeping a close watch. Princess’s eyes lingered on them for a second, then she shook her head and sighed again.
“Your people need you right now, milady. Dark times are coming, and you need to put their minds at ease. Rumors that The Red Basin [well, there it is, the first mention of The Red Basin. Bet you didn’t’ think it would even get added this entry, did you?” has been found have found their way to the townsfolk, and there is much fearful talk in the streets.” Darian spoke the words quietly, not wishing any of the nearby dogs to hear him mention such talk.
“I know, my general. I must speak with the counsel, forthwith.” Princess stiffened her posture and began the journey up to the top level of the city. As she passed the townsfolk, they all looked to her with quiet, frightened faces. How much Princess wished she could tell them that the rumors they had heard were false! But she was a queen, and to spread false hope wasn’t her duty. It was to keep her people safe from danger, and this is exactly what she meant to do. After their short path up to the palace was nearing its end, the four noticed that they had a fairly large crowd following close behind them, all shaky and wide eyed dogs, watching their queen with great interest. Princess turned and addressed them as she got to the palace gates.
“You are all to return to your lives. If there is a need for it, I will call a grand meeting and inform you of what must be done. Now, go back to your homes or businesses! Go on now! Go home!” The dogs slowly filtered back down to their homes, but Princess had done nothing to alleviate their fears. The gates were opened up by a pair of burly mastiffs, both dressed in the royal guard uniforms, and Princess, followed closely by the Corgi Bros. walked up the long courtyard to the palace doors. Darian nodded to the mastiffs and shouted to Princess’ back to her.
“Milady! I shall return before the morning to bring what news I may find!” He then lowered his posture and darted off into the streets, searching for some kind of relief to his peoples worries. The palace gates swung open and three finely dressed dogs; a poodle, greyhound and an elderly corgi scurried down the palace steps to meet Princess flanked by two vicious looking bulldogs.
“Your majesty!” squeaked the poodle “you have been gone longer than expected! We have grave news!”
“We shall discuss it in the war room, Percy, this is not the place.” She then looked at the greyhound and corgi and said “Gwen, General Stein” to the two respectively. “Call the other counsel members to the war room, and have the workers bring up plenty of dishes of water. This will be a long meeting.”

Noah stumbled down the rusting stairs toward toe door of the building. He was covered with sweat, and his arms ached from having to carry The G Bomb down all the way from the fifth story.
“Dammit The G Bomb, why do I always have to carry you up and down stairs? You have rocket feet!” Noah pouted as they reached the bottom of their journey down. As if in silent response, The G Bomb briefly activated his rocket feet, scorching the front of Noah’s shirt and causing him to shout out in surprise and pain. He dropped The G Bomb who landed with a loud clunk on his side. His eye plate lit up and his raspy, mechanical voice belched out
“The infidel will return me to upright!”. Emily giggled at Noah as she passed him and went through the big metal door to the street outside.
“This is the last time I’m picking you up, The G Bomb!” Noah groaned as he set the robot back onto its tracks. He then followed Emily out the door, but just as it was closing, he turned to see The G Bomb sitting at the exit, unmoving. “What now?” Noah asked.
“This doorway has a lip. I require immediate extraction.” Noah sighed and tugged The G Bomb out of the building, where It hummed off in front of him after Emily.
“Stupid robot, make me look like an idiot.” Noah closed the building door and headed off to catch up. He hadn’t gone more than a few steps when he heard Emily shout out.
“Princess! Where’s Princess?” Noah scurried around the corner to see Emily standing over the shattered window her car. There was blood and broken glass scattered everywhere. “Princess! Where are you?” Emily cried out, not really expecting an answer. Noah put his hand on Emily’s shoulder and said “It was probably quick and painless, or at least quick.” Emily swatted his hand off her shoulder and sobbed into her hands. “The G Bomb, Can you do a DNA scan on the blood to see if it‘s Princess’?” Emily sputtered.
“No.” The G Bomb retorted.
“Oh, ok.” Emily said. “I didn’t really think you would.” Noah put his hands in his pockets and looked at the car. What a mess. After a minute or so, Noah said
“Emily, we have a job to do. Princess wouldn’t have wanted us to be late, just on her account. She was a good annoying little dog, as far as annoying little dogs go, and I’m sure that she’s in a better place.” Noah got Emily on her feet, who then rubbed her eyes and straightened her posture and, sniffling, but not crying, said
“You’re right, Noah, although speeches about being late are kind of useless coming from you.” She went around to the driver seat and opened the door. “Let’s go.” Noah opened the back passenger door for The G Bomb, who made no move to get in. Noah sighed, and heaved the small robot into the back seat, bumping his head rather hard in the process. Rubbing his sore noggin, Noah sat down on the broken glass and blood in the passenger seat, and the three were off, on their daring mission to liberate tables from Donnie’s Discount Tablery!

Snap. That was a long entry. Not the best as far as writing goes, but it has a lot of story crammed into it. Be sure that the Founding Six will come into play, as well as The G Bomb. Who is getting pretty funny, I might add. Oh, and by the way, I do apologize for the lack of hilarious material in this one. This chapter is taking a bit of a serious turn, but more assurances from me, the next one will be a blast, with great new characters, hilarious circumstances, and maybe some martial arts battle sequences! But not likely! Anyways! Go away!

Part 4

Well I’ll be damned... I have nothing to do at work. I’ve been able to churn out two entries to The Red Basin, and have been pretty much free to do so all day, so I thought, it’s already a two-fer, why not try for a three-fer (which I can say, because it’s a word, weather you like it or not.) Now, last time I wrote something (about 2.30 hours ago, it was about how our Hero, or at least our Character, Noah, had been late for work, made it, on his way out, etc. Seems that he had a mix-up with a shirt or something, whatever. Not worth repeating. You’re probably sitting there like an apple thinking to yourself “Where’s The Red Basin?”, and I am in fact here to ease your thoughts. The Red Basin, however important to this tales direction, will not show up in this entry either. Unfortunately you (but not I, the creator of The Red Basin) will have to wait until the entry right after this one to see The Red Basin in action. This entry will focus on a second principal character in the Grand Skeem of Things. That character is none other than the one you were lease likely to imagine as a main character in this grand tale (no, I don’t mean Sven Ploon. What a good name though!). It’s Princess, the dog. Princess, as you well know, has been sitting in Emily’s car for the past 3 hours. Or has she (she hasn’t, by the way)? Anyways, this bitch (Princess, not your poor ol’ Aunt Myrtle) is off gallivanting, while Emily was waiting in the empty room for Noah. (I take it back, Myrtle is a bitch still, and always will be). For this entry, we begin in Emily’s car.

Take it away, Craig!

Well, here’s an unfortunate coincidence. Not only has poor princess been locked up in this car for the last 20 minutes (yes, this chapter starts BEFORE the last one ended! What skilled writing skills!) but it was 35 degrees out, and the sun was roasting the poor dog. Princess sat on the passenger seat of the small rusting car, staring out the window, begging to be let out. Her fur was beginning to get matted from the sweat, and her small crown was beginning to weigh heavily on her head (the dog wears a crown. It'll come into play later). She pressed her nose to the very top of the window, where it was opened a crack, and tried to get at some of that fresh air. No dice for poor little Princess. One last shot at getting some air, and she was sitting back on the seat, panting like a German Schoolboy (that comment there makes no sense at all). Suddenly, and out of nowhere (I mean, suddenly, from outside the car) a shadow engulfed Princess, and she looked up to see a horridly ugly face staring down through the window at her. The face was fat and hairy, and covered in what Princess would have guessed to be spicy mustard. The man (it was in fact a man, Sven Ploon, to be painfully specific) pressed his dirty face and looked at Princess through the glass. After what the terrified Princess thought was about 16 seconds (which it was) he let out a strange, low growl-like sound, sending spittle skittering down the window. Princess withdrew slightly, as the creature pressed his face harder against the glass. Princess was beginning to get afraid of this ghoul, and hopped over to the driver seat to avoid his glare. The man kept staring though, and pushing his head harder and harder against the car window, until suddenly there was a loud crash, making princess jump. The man’s face had pressed the window past its breaking point, and he plunged into the car, scattering broken glass everywhere. Princess barked at the man, who, being rather stunned, removed his bleeding head from the car and pretending to look calm and collected, strode off, whistling to himself (I believe it was the star wars theme?). He then tripped over a newspaper and fell down an uncovered manhole which was then covered up by a city worker that was doing maintenance. (I just don’t feel like talking about this bastard anymore). Princess, shaken, but not stirred, gasped at the sudden flow of cool air coming to the car. What a relief! But she still didn’t want to sit in this apparently public deathtrap anymore, so out the window she went, doing her best to avoid broken glass and bloodstains.
Princess, you see, is more than just a dog. Or at least, all dogs (and some cats) in the universe of The Red Basin are smarter and more human like than (what we think) the animals we have here in Real World Land. Princess knew some other dogs in this area of town, and was sure that Noah (whom she had learned to never expect to be on time) would be at least another two hours and forty minutes (which is exactly accurate. See? The dogs here ARE smart!). After about 5 minutes of walking down the dirty street, Princess came up to an alley that ran between an old abandoned Cold Storage building, and a large Shopping Centre (not a mall, but more of a strip-mall type place, with like a suit store or some kind of dollar mart or something). Princess strode down the alley, which became darker and darker as she went, until all those without doggy vision would be blind. She reached the end of the alley, which had an interesting carving on a large stone tablet situated next to the back wall of the Cold Storage building. After checking to see if she had been followed, Princess barked three times, and the outline of the carving began to glow, incredibly faintly, slowly increasing in luminosity until it was enough to read Bazooka Joe comics by. The carving then began giving off a low hum, which (almost like the light, only with volume) got louder and louder until it was a steady growl coming from the wall. Princess sat on her haunches, and watched the carving as it slowly slid apart, one side to the left, one to the right, revealing an opening into the side of the cold storage. Some smoke or something (for effect) gushed out of the opening, and once it had settles, a German Shepard followed closely by two Corgis strode out toward Princess. The three dogs were all suited up in fine sets of shining armor, the German Shepard wearing a tabard of fine silk, and the Corgis with helmets of dazzling silver, with large peacock plumes atop them.
“My Liege!” growled the German Shepard, ad he and his cohorts dipped into low bows.
“Arise, my soldiers, you need not bow before me. Darian, The Corgi Bros., I may be your queen, but am I not still your friend?” Princess walked up to each of them and nudged their eyes back onto her. “Come my faithful hounds, we have much to discuss.”

Oh, man. That was some fine writing, I must say. It gave me Goosebumps! Those dogs, what a team. And who would have thought that Princess was actually a queen! (I mean seriously, her name is Princess, not Queen.) And what a cliffhanger! I’m more than 100% sure that you’ll be coming back to read the next installment. It’ll be a good one. And of course, hopefully you didn’t forget that that’s the installment where The Red Basin comes into play! You did forget? You fool…. No matter, you’ll heal.
Anyways, like I said before, you just wasted your time. Now, go to bed or something.

Part 3

I’m sick of introductions and prologues. I’ve written both parts of a one part intro, and it’s almost made me not want to continue this masterpiece. But, I shall preserver. Anyways, this is the first chapter of The Red Basin, and it’s going to be a good one, possibly seeding ideas for a good two. Now, I don’t know how I’m going to write this story.. weather I have it as a descriptive type thing (eg. Noah got up and stretched lazily. The sun peeked through his half-shut blinds like the little Australian man who usually did the same.) or if I’ll possibly do it first person, through the perspective of Noah (eg. I got up and stretched lazily. The sun peeked through my half-shut blinds like the little Australian man who usually did the same.). Either way is entertaining, and neither should be put to rest… except that I think the first person one is useless and gone. Guess it’s third person for us! Well. Here we go…

Our Story Begins….

Noah got up and stretched lazily. The sun peeked through his half-shut blinds like the little Australian man who usually did the same. It was eleven o’clock, on a Tuesday. This particular Tuesday was situated near the end of the month of October. Noah looked at his Puppies-and-Kitties wall- calendar, and became aware of the fact that I just dictated to you. This months picture was an adorable little kitten, tan in colour, sitting in a carved out pumpkin. Noah stretched again, and sat up, then, reaching for a pair of previously discarded pants and slid them on over his pale underpants. After his pants were pretty much secured on, he scratched his messy hair and called out “The G Bomb! Get me some coffee, please!” There was the sound of atomic powered gears going into motion, and a buzzing as the short robot The G Bomb rolled into Noah’s room, crunching CD cases and dirty laundry in his direct path to his summoner. “Dark please, The G Bomb, with two sugar.” The robot hummed and vibrated a bit, then a small, pleasant-sounding bell went off, and his chest cabinet opened up revealing a piping hot cup of coffee. Noah reached for it, and as his hand was nearly on the cup, the robot backed up slightly, making Noah tumble out of his bed onto the floor, breaking more CD cases in the process. “Ugh..” Noah crawled back onto the bed and rubbed his elbow, which had taken the brunt of his spill, and snatched up the cup of coffee from the now stationary robot. Once again rubbing his elbow, Noah took a sip of his coffee. Mid sip, however, his face scrunched up into a frown, and he looked over at The G Bomb “This coffee is awful!” The robot began humming again, and its eye-plate lit up red.
“I will annihilate you!” it rasped, in its buzzing metallic voice.
“Yea, yea, I know you will.” Noah sighed, pouring the coffee into a fishbowl on the ground and putting the now empty cup into the overflowing trash can. “Just go get the mail.” The G Bomb hummed and rolled out of the room, making sure to knock over the coffee-filled fish bowl as it went. Noah gave another long sigh and put an old John Lennon t-shirt over the puddle. “Well, I guess it’s off to work for me.” Noah stood up and looked around his room, once again tending his elbow. What should I wear? It’s my first day at my new job, and I want to impress them. Noah scanned the room again, this time his eyes came to rest on the open (and very empty) closet, and, for the third time this morning, Noah let out a long sigh.

“Where’s Noah?” a young girl, who in fact was the only young girl I’ve introduced (Emily Watson) asked the empty room, as she paced back and forth. Noah was over three hours late, which wasn’t that unusual, but this time it was the fact that he was three hours late for his first day at work that bothered Emily. Amazingly (which I can fit in any time I want, being the god and creator of this story) the door to the bare room squeaked open and Noah entered, looking slightly disheveled followed closely by The G Bomb. “What are you doing here so late Noah!? I’ve been here for almost-.” She stopped mid sentence as she got a closer look at Noah. “What happened to you?” Her eyes examined Noah’s shirt, which seemed to be covered in a large coffee stain. “Missed your mouth?” she asked, with a slight smile.
“Hilarious.” Noah groaned. “my robot was acting up, and I didn’t have any clean cloths, so I had to wear this shirt.”
“That was your cleanest shirt?”
“Well, yea.” Noah said, without looking Emily in the face. She stood and looked at Noah for a second longer, than shook her head.
“Anyways, we have a job to do. I got a call from Jason [seems like I’ve used four characters already!] and he needs us to go across town and pick up some tables for him at Donny’s Discount Tablery. He said something about fancy white trimmed ones or something? I don’t know. But yea, we have to go get them, so we can get paid. You remember what getting paid is, right? It’s where someone gives you money so you can do laundry maybe? Or perhaps buy deodorant?”
“I smell just fine, you whore.” retorted Noah, giving himself a quick sniff. “I smell like Kenyan Dark, with two sugar. That’s a fine smell!”
“Incorrect. You disgust all.” The G Bomb commented.
“I really need to get that thing fixed.” Noah shrugged.
“Right. Well. Whatever, we still need to get going. I left Princess [that’s five characters!] in the car, and she doesn’t like to be left alone for more than ten minutes, let alone three hours! Let’s go!” Emily commanded as she pointed out the door. Noah grumbled and turned to walk out, but without budging The G Bomb held its ground and Noah banged his shin into the small robot. After a second collecting himself, Noah proceeded to go around the stubborn machine after which The G Bomb hummed alive and rolled along behind him, Emily following close in tow…

Well, there’s the beginning of chapter one. I don’t want it to be too long, and I don’t feel like writing any more right now, but it’s getting better, I must say. The story is now in motion! Noah, Emily and The G Bomb are on their way to Emily’s car to get Princess and be on their way to Donny’s Discount Tablery. The next part of this chapter, will introduce Princess as a fairly major player in the Grand Skeem of things, and possibly even make you weep, it’s so touching.
Hope that was satisfactory, it will improve until you cry every time you think about The Red Basin.
Anyways, go do something productive now, you slacker!

Part 2

So as I sit here at work, gleaning a story out of my previous entry, I came to a startling realization: Character descriptions are boring, and can go to hell. I’ll simply list some characters now (in order of height) and some of their prominent features/relationships with other characters. Maybe after I get this damn dirty anti-blog out of my system, I can finally begin the actual STORY concerning the Red Basin. Anyhow, these are the characters.

Noah Robbering – Shortest character, but not by much. Also, coincidentally, the main character. Noah is a young boy of no more than… possibly 15, although I’m sure my opinion and description of him will change once the story starts. He’s blonde, maybe, and has a pierced ear? No, that’s not good. We’ll say that he doesn’t have a pierced ear, but some type of scar, maybe on his face. Enough about this little thing though, I don’t feel like adding more about him.
So there you have it, the main character, although already I think I’m going to upgrade his age to about 25. 15 is too young to be interesting. And he’s not blonde anymore. He has brown hair. Also, since I’m changing him, he won’t be the shortest anymore. He’ll be the fifth shortest.
Emily Watson – This girl is the protagonist’s sidekick. She’s a little bit shorter than him. In general, she’s always in good humor, and goes about solving mysteries in her free time, very akin to Penny Gadget (from the epically popular Inspector Gadget series). Her attitudes and appearance are very different though, and she’s not juvenile and annoying like Penny, but moderately mature and has a more realistic outlook on things. She has a small dog (the kind suitable for putting in a purse or handbag) whose name is Princess, and is known more or less as a cliché. The dog won’t come into play terribly often although I’m sure I can fit it into some devious sub-plot or side-story. Possibly aliens. Anyways, Emily can be described as cute, because honestly, who wants to hear a story about an ugly or unattractive person? Unless that person is being used for comic relief, or the story is one so unserious that people won’t care weather the person is ugly or not. This brings me to my next character, whom I just came up with from my own inspiration.
Sven Ploon – Sven is ugly. And fat. He’s a big fat ugly guy, who no one really likes to hang out with, because of the previous description of him. Like I said, nobody wants to read a story about an ugly person, unless he’s for comic relief. Which is all that this smelly wad of flesh good for. End of description. (apart from this little ditty about his name being funny. Sven Ploon.. Man I’m clever!)
Carlos Runningwater – This gentleman is rather svelte. Stemming from a long line of rich, greasy people, Carlos is a menace to society. Only in the sense that he’s useless and thinks he’s not, and that he’s rather unpleasant to smell or be around. Having spent all his inherited money on a ludicrously overpriced tattoo on his chest/back/shoulders/arms/legs, Carlos also used up his fortune on a lifetime supply of brill cream, so his short dark hair is in a constant state of slicked-back. He’ll come up in the story more often as an information provider or kneecap buster. His physical strength is rather meek, but his leather jacket and pants cover up his frame well enough to make him intimidating.
Vegan Sans – This character has been added simply for the sake of an having an additional character. I’ll describe him when I feel the need.
The G Bomb – This character has been added due to a certain other person existing on the internet. He has requested that a character made in his liking be added to the story, and so it shall be. I, however get to choose this character’s description, behavior, and whatever else I want in order for him to be in the tale of The Red Basin. The G Bomb is an atomically powered robot. His powers include x-ray vision, rocket feet, and of course, a coffee machine in his chest. He owned by Noah and used sort of as a second sidekick (or a sidekick, which is the technical term.). His creator, Dr. Enthusio, made him to be the ultimate killing machine, but after having created him, he realized that this little robot wasn’t equipped with anything to achieve such killing (except perhaps educing cancer with prolonged exposure to his x-ray vision). So long story shortened slightly, The G Bomb is menacing, and hates all humans, but can’t do anything about it, and no one takes him seriously. What a drag, you poor little robot.
Dr. Enthusio – Seeing how I just made this character up from the previous mention of a Dr., I’ll have to describe him, won’t I? Well, we’ll be quick about it, my coffee’s getting cold. Colder. Well, he’s a scientist of the fairly mad persuasion, and wears… black with purple trim? French cuffs on his shirt with eyeball cuff links. Crazy hair, glasses, the whole deal. Yea. He had a son who died or something, and made The G Bomb as a replacement maybe. I don’t care. He’s going to be a villain of some sort, I guess, but he may be just a kindly old man who’s misunderstood (unlikely, that’s boring). There we have it. Dr. Enthusio.

I guess as far as character descriptions go, this is going very well, although I have slightly contradicted my opening statement by making this entry so much longer than the last one. But oh well, I’m not afraid of a little constructive criticism, from either you, or your Aunt Myrtle (who’s a bitch, by the way). I assume that I can post this, and then perhaps later make actual progress into the telling of the story. Whatever happens, I’m not going to argue. I do have a long day here at work, and I’ve only been here for 2.28 hours. 5.72 more hours to go. Oh damn! I need to add illustrations! Arg… this is going to take all day now! Oh well. They’ll be good, I hope. Or maybe they’ll be nothing. Either way, you’ve just spent about 10 minutes reading this entry, and you can’t un-read it, so ha. Hope you stick around for the next installment of…

Part 1.

This isn't really a blog. It's more of just a ramble, or maybe babble. Whichever works. Or wait, it could possibly be an Anti-blog. We'll go with that. But enough of this gay banter, it makes no sense for me to be adding this nothing at the beginning of a long and interesting tale. This entry (or anti-entry) is called The Red Basin, after all. Sit back and listen. Or read. It's a tale, of which there is no point, but has the potential to captivate and enslave the mind. No, it doesn't, but it might give you ideas for other spin-offs of sitcoms that could be on the horizon. Although Humor isn't the main ingredient, I'll be sure to add as much of it as I see fit, weather appropriate to the situation or atmosphere or not.
Well, as the tale begins, I must first point out the characters that take part in it.
Beginning with the least important (as is the custom for stories about nothing) we have Harold R. Goods. An aging man from the southern United States, that suffers from bad arthritis in his knees and elbows. His prominent features are all stereotypical in the category of elderly homeless man. His face is long and his eyes are fairly hollow, but he has tales that could keep the attention of even those most terribly afflicted with ADD. But enough about this rotten old man., His part is minor, and meaningless in the Grand Skeem of Things. His character bothers me, and I assume that I will make his part even less significant in the days to come, due to this non-liking I have for him.
Second, we have a character who's role may actually be considered as substantial, although not major or meaningful in any way shape or form. Jason A. D. Simon is a young man (possibly in his mid 30's?) that although having not gone to school prior to his high-school graduation, is doing fairly well for himself, and has purchased a small boutique in the northern end of the city you will be introduced to in some time, on a street called Dugald. In fact, the address of this building is #223, Dugald Street. Uninteresting. The boutique shares residence (and rent) in #223 Dugald with a Cafe' called White Rooster Cafe'. Slightly digressed from the description of Jason A. D. Simon, but it will come up in this story, to be sure. Returning to my previous train of thought, Jason stands nearly 6" tall, and has light coloured hair. He is a moderately attractive young man, but nothing that would really stand out in a crowd. He acts with quiet optimism most of the time, covering up a sense of nervousness that he feels nearly every second he's awake. Reason for this nervousness? Unknown as of now. Perhaps the story will uncover the reason. More than likely though, I will forget about it and leave it out of the Grand Skeem of Things. Moving away from Jason A.D. Simon though.
Seeing how I'm already getting bored with this tale, I believe that I’ll end this first entry into The Red Basin with this. Hopefully it has at least peeked your interest slightly, or at least marginally enough for you to perhaps seek out and read a second entry, if it ever comes to be published on this page. As for me, I'll continue adding illustration to my Box of Assorted Bolts, so keep informed, and keep your eye on My Dominion!

The story so far...

Alright, this is where I'm going to post the unedited version of The Red Basin so far. It's a nice little place to catch up with old characters. Make sure you read it over a bunch of times, and slowly, as to make it seem longer. You see, if you read it slowly, and it takes you say, 3 hours to read, it seems like I've written a lot more. That being said, you better get a move on, it'll be like 3:00am when you're done at this pace!

Reintroductions.

Well well well, have I got a treat in store for you! After much soul-searching and insipritional novels, I have decided the worlds needs me. So, today, what now appears to be Monday, April 28, 2008, The Red Basin is back, and it's better than you thought it could have been before, if that were even possible! That's right, I'm here today to tell you that I have come out of a long 2 year hiatus to bring you the much anticipated 3rd chapter to the story! If you thought it couldn't get any better, you're wrong! I find that you're wrong often, latley, but that's ok, I'm usually right! That means more fun, more Red Basin, more tears, more unanswered questions, and finally, fiiinally a third chapter to pick up that amazing climactic cliffhanger that I left you all years ago! I will now pause for you to catch your breath. Take as much time as needed here to gather yourself. That's enough time. You should have read slower. Nobody has any self-controle these days. Ah well, you can't help it. I've made you the mess you are today! Speaking of messed, here it is! I give you, THE RED BASIN TWO: The 3rd Chapter! Dra